A Time-Bomb in my Mom’s Head

After watching “In Time” movie (Justin Timberlake and Amanda Seyfried) wayback in 2011, I asked myself what if our time here on earth is really limited, what would I do? Should I spend all my savings for all my wants or still be hopeful that my life will be longer than I expected. I guess the good thing about the movie aside from being a plain fiction, you know until what time/day you will last so you still have time to find a way how to prolong it unlike having a time bomb in your head.

2013 was I guess one of the saddest year in my family’s life because my mom was diagnosed having aneurysm or what they simply call “time bomb in your head”. Both of my parents have hypertension which runs in both their families, aside from cancer history, asthma, heart attack, etc. Overall, we’re rich in different types of illness.

As per Google’s definition, aneurysm is “an excessive localized enlargement of an artery caused by a weakening of the artery wall.” In my mom’s case, the nerve responsible for her sight is being pressed by the enlargement of her artery so it is affected. Doctors say that there’s really no symptoms nor signs for a person with aneurysm. We accidentally discovered it when my mom was admitted due to hypertension. When interviewed by doctors, she told them that there are white dots on her left eyes that kept floating and she feels dizzy most of the time. The neurologist said what she felt were not connected with aneurysm which puzzled us. They asked for CT Scan then another CT-Scan (with dye) for my mom’s head down her neck which showed the large size of aneurysm. She also underwent another test (4 vessel angiogram) in Philippine Heart Center to see the actual size and what veins are affected.

Upon learning this, we had 4 opinions from different neuro-surgeons – 2 said they won’t advise the open-surgery since once it was opened, it will be opened again and again. They also consider stenting and coiling which need a huge sum of money. The other 2 said open-surgery  - I believe because it’s their specialty. My mom’s siblings and us, her children decided not to go with open surgery. Aside from being too risky, there are complications that may be encountered. My sister worked with neurologists before, she had many patients with complication due to brain open-surgery.

For the procedure of stenting and coiling, aside from the need to save up to 1 million pesos plus other miscellaneous, there is a risk of stroke during or after the procedure. So it’s like, do we have any other options how this won’t happen? And the answer is none. It’s like 8% risk and 92% safe which is already huge for us since it’s our mother’s life that we’re talking about. We’re not after the amount we’ll be spending but the life of my mom after the procedure. What if it didn’t go well, can my mom survive as stroke patient. It’s like we’re just making it worst. My mom just said “pabayaan na natin, malaki gastos nyo at di din naman natin alam hanggang kelan na lang ako” which really broke my heart.

What we decided, leave it as it is. My reason is simple, GOD gave it to her so she could strengthen her faith more and no problem is given to us that we cannot overcome with HIS help. My sister’s idea is similar to mine but for her, it’s mainly prevention. My mom should avoid fatty foods and thinking too much to prevent hypertension. My brother on the other hand, is still thinking of having the stenting and coiling procedure though he’s a bit hesitant because of the risk of stroke that my mom may encounter.

I guess when this problem occurred, the best thing to ask is HIM. That’s what changed me and my belief. I started to pray hard but most of the time still cry when I think of my mom. I always ask her not to think too much and bring back her strong faith to HIM and everything will be okay. My mom used to visit St. Clair in Katipunan every time she’s here in Manila. I’m not sure why she lost track of it so I asked her to make it a habit -doing the old times ‘coz maybe HE’s just testing her how much she believes.

We decided that my mom would stop working (at the age of 53). She just needs to go back to work this end of January for the turnover of her pending work. And she’ll stay with us here in Manila. We’re hoping that GOD will make everything well in HIS perfect time.